From Jessica:
So its been a really long time since we've posted anything to this site. Having a toddler and two very busy jobs will do that do you. Our heartiest of apologies for those who miss seeing more videos, pictures and stories of Miss Cecelia's escapades.
As an update, around last June Clint and I decided to move forward with beginning the adoption process. We were in no huge rush to have another child but figured that with adoption, we're not in charge of our timeline so might a well get the wheels turning. We updated our homestudy, found an agency that we liked and put together our marketing package to the birthmoms. 6 months later we found a match.
Birthmom was young, and mom to three other children two of whom lived with her. The third she gave up for adoption two years ago. Part of why we liked her was that she had previous experience with adoption and told us she knew what to expect. We were hoping to avoid the chaos that we experienced with Cece's birth mom. Her reasons for wanting to place her current child with us is that she lives in a town with no future and wants this child to see the world, go to college and be successful. So... We all sign an adoption agreement in December and off we went.
We found out that the baby was a boy and that he was due on my brother's birthday, July 8, 2011. Clint and I started making plans at work for take time off once he was born. We got the house, and most importantly, Cece, ready for the new baby.
Then, last Sunday we missed a text from the birthmother stating that her water broke and she was in labor. The Indianapolis Agency (we have two because birthmom is out of state in Michigan) called us to tell us what was going on. We panicked a bit because this was around a month early. We ran around the house like chickens with our heads cutoff for a while. Thankfully, I had packed everything we needed for the baby earlier in the month. I hadn't packed clothing for us though, so Clint and I literally threw a bunch of stuff in a bag and shoved everything in the van. Lord knows what we have to wear.
The hardest part of getting ready to meet the new baby was saying goodbye to Cecelia. She was napping at the time we got the call. Our plan was for Teresa to come and stay with Cece because we could be up in Michigan for as long as 2 weeks. This plan was delayed a bit because Teresa was not in Columbus, IN but rather on her way back from a wedding in Tennessee! Thankfully our great babysitter was able to pinch hit for us until Teresa came into town. I miss my Cecelia SOOOOOO much but know she is in good hands! I always thought she was the one with separation anxiety, but I guess it really is Mama who has the problem!
We arrived in the Detroit area around 8:30pm and checked into our hotel. We had not heard anything from the birthmom since 4:00pm. The Michigan agency just told us to cool our heels and stop by the hospital in the morning. Of course, I didn't cool my heels very well and got maybe 2 hours of sleep that whole night, worrying about the baby and the birthmother and our adoption plan.
The next morning we arrived at the hospital at 8:00. We were told the baby was born on June 12, 2011 at 6:00pm weighing in at 5 lbs 12 oz and was 18.5 inches long. He was just brought to the birthmom and she wanted a bit of personal time with him before we came up. We hung around the hospital and waited for the invitation up to visit her. Meanwhile we were madly texting and emailing our families and friends with the information about the birth.
Birthmom called us at 10:00 saying it was OK to come see her. We bought her flowers and some small toys for her two children. We gave her a hug when we arrived and chatted with her briefly. Then we got to hold the boy. He is teeny tiny with a full head of straight black hair. The hospital set us up temporarily in a broom closet and we were allowed to spend some alone time with the baby. We cooed and cried and took pictures. Things looked great
I won't get into all the nitty gritty details because they're too fresh (and complicated) to work with at this moment. However, the drama and stress got ramped up because the birthfather strode into the picture and is refusing to respect birthmom's adoption plan. There is a possibility that he may continue to exert his rights a "father" and end up with the baby over birthmom's stated plan.
The current situation is this:
The baby, whom we are calling Tobias James, is in our care per the birthmother's adoption plan. He was discharged from the hospital yesterday afternoon and we are all settling in at our long term stay hotel. Birthmom, however, can revoke her consent to this arrangement any time before the hearing on Temporary Placement is held. Birthmother was discharged from the hospital shortly before Toby, and is at home. She still says she is not changing her mind about her adoption plan. Our agency in Michigan is working on getting a hearing date for the Consent to Temporary Placement. We cannot leave the state with Toby until that hearing is held. If the hearing is held, birthfather shows up, and refuses to give his consent to the adoption we may be in for a protracted legal battle to attempt to terminate his parent rights. This is NOT where we want to be. We are hoping we can reach some agreement with the birthfather before the hearing to obtain his consent. As much as it breaks my heart to say it, us coming home with Toby is not a sure fire thing.
We will keep you posted as things progress, but in the meantime, we are getting into a rhythm with caring for Toby and trying to get him on a schedule. He's a pretty typical newborn who sleeps a ton and when he's not sleeping he's pooping or eating (sometimes at the same time). He's pretty little so none of the clothes we brought for him fit, but he's not vain yet so no worries :)
Please keep us all in your thoughts and prayers. We may need a miracle for this all to work out well.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Saturday, August 21, 2010
August Update, II
Curtain Hide and Seek:
New Toy:
Playing in the Rain:
Daddy 101 -- Keep Her away from Traffic:
New Toy:
Playing in the Rain:
Daddy 101 -- Keep Her away from Traffic:
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)