Sunday, November 22, 2009
Friday, October 30, 2009
Friday, October 16, 2009
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Adoption Hearing
Tim was the camera-man, and he didn't know to turn it off when the festivities were over, so you really only need to watch the first half. The second half is nauseating, frankly.
This video was taken shortly after Cecelia became our daughter, officially.
This video was taken shortly after Cecelia became our daughter, officially.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Sunday, July 12, 2009
7/12 update
Hello, all. Sorry for the lack of posting. There's really not all that much to post about. Cecelia sleeps, eats, cries, pees, and poops. That's all the excitement there is. The biggest news is that we are getting her onto a scheduled routine pretty successfully. We have been following the teachings of Tracy Hogg's Secrets of the Baby Whisperer, at the recommendation of my friend Yu-Hsiang Lin, who had a baby in the winter. He, obviously, got the Chinese translation, but he swore by it.
Cecelia is a spirited/grumpy baby, but she's beginning to do well overnight. She's been sleeping about 2.5 to 3 hours in a stint and taking her mid-night feeding like a champ. Eat, change, go back down. I'd hardly call it a sure-fire win just yet, but we're already seeing results compared to the first week she's been here.
Baby shower is this afternoon. I start my sales training in Indy tomorrow and will be up there daily for 3 weeks before hitting the field in August. Jessica is officially on maternity leave for 8 weeks. Things are going just great.
Not many photos. Above are a few of her with her Granddad. I think there are a few on our camera, but I'll wait until after the shower to load them all.
Friday, July 3, 2009
First Promenade
The whole family, Rosie and Grover included, went for a stroll this morning around 9:30 before it got blistering hot. It was our first time taking the stroller out so I'm sure we looked pretty wet behind the ears maneuvering it around the curbs and cracks in the sidewalk. I'm surprised by how much work it is! Little Miss Cece slept through much of it, which is not unexpected because she likes rocking/vibrating motions.
The dogs on the other hand, LOVED the walk. They were getting pretty stir crazy from being cooped up in the house since Tuesday so they were prancing along the whole time. The dogs are amazingly good with Cece. They're very calm around her (but not our numerous guests--sorry!). Grover frequently comes into the nursery when we're feeding her in the night/morning and lies down next to the crib. Rosie likes to lick her head and ears. When Cece is in her swing and we're moving about the house Rosie will peer into the nursery, just to check things out. While Rosie and Grover are both slightly more needy since Cece's arrival, I couldn't ask for better behavior out of them in regards to her.
We may venture out into the wide world of Target later today as well need a few more nipples, pacifier clips, eggs and coffee. What a strange grocery list huh? Right now though, we're camped out on the couch having some mommy-daughter tummy time.
The dogs on the other hand, LOVED the walk. They were getting pretty stir crazy from being cooped up in the house since Tuesday so they were prancing along the whole time. The dogs are amazingly good with Cece. They're very calm around her (but not our numerous guests--sorry!). Grover frequently comes into the nursery when we're feeding her in the night/morning and lies down next to the crib. Rosie likes to lick her head and ears. When Cece is in her swing and we're moving about the house Rosie will peer into the nursery, just to check things out. While Rosie and Grover are both slightly more needy since Cece's arrival, I couldn't ask for better behavior out of them in regards to her.
We may venture out into the wide world of Target later today as well need a few more nipples, pacifier clips, eggs and coffee. What a strange grocery list huh? Right now though, we're camped out on the couch having some mommy-daughter tummy time.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Second (?) visit with Dr. Franklin
Went to the pediatrician for her two month well visit. She's a knuckle shy of 9 pounds. She does have a umbilical hernia, but it's of zero concern. It doesn't hurt and there's nothing to do about it. She'll grow out of it over the next few months. Other than that and a snuffy nose brought on, probably, by some minor exposure to smoke at her previous abode, she's doing fantastic. She's gaining weight at a nice clip. Got her her vaccines (no polio for this baby Rotarian). Dr. Franklin had some association with Cecelia in the hospital when she was born, so she's known her for quite a while. She was impressed by how much bigger she is less than 6 weeks later.
First day as parents successful
Well, we managed to make it through the day without breaking Cecelia. Yesterday was a good day. We didn't sleep much the first night we had Cecelia. She was fine overnight, only getting us up 4 times, but we couldn't sleep between feedings so it was a miserable night for us. It made yesterday kind of hazy. But, Tim helped us out a TON by putting together the changing table and driving up to Greenwood to pick up, disassemble, ship, unload, and reassemble the crib. Cecelia's room is now fully set up. Jessica worked yesterday morning, leaving me along with a sleeping baby on my gut and a laptop on my, err...., lap to try to work. I'm now officially a LOT behind in my studies, so this holiday weekend will have to be catch-up time for me. Beth did come over to drop off some stuff and helped me out, watching the baby while I took a shower.
And then, Julie and Mom came over. And, boy, did Julie come over, and come through. She brought all the hardware and clothes that Ainsley has grown out of. We. Are. Stocked. To the point that the pending baby shower swag should actually skew toward an older baby. Swing, vibrating chair, bumpo, and two (TWO!) crates of clothes, and stuff I'm probably forgetting. The love was a bit overwhelming.
We then packed up Cecelia for her first road trip. We went to the Bloomington Sunrise Rotary's annual meeting at which Bob Jones took over as club President. We couldn't stay long, though, but we needed to let our Rotary family meet her.
The Hanes came over after the Rotary party. Jessika held her the whole time while we all watched So You Think You Can Dance. After that, bedtime, and we actually slept between feedings. The McCarty's got us a gadget that is kind of a multiple egg-timer, so that we can track how long it's been since she was last fed, last changed, put down for sleep. It was a big help overnight when everything is kind of a drowsy fog of feeding and crying.
Oh, and I twinged my back. Of course. Perfect timing to get a sore back.
She sees the Pediatrician this afternoon. Then a bit of shopping. And I need to get some work done.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Holy crap, we have a baby!
Cecelia Ann Merkel arrived today around 5:30. This has been, without a doubt, the most whirlwind 24 hours of our lives. Holly, our attorney, came to Jessica's office yesterday around 4:30 and said the girl who ripped our hearts out last month has changed her mind and would like to give the baby up for adoption. We decided to say yes, bought out Target at 9 PM last night, and spent today fretting about consent forms being actually, for real, signed by the birth-mother and a court order granting us guardianship signed by the judge. Around 4 today that was all wrapped up and Holly and Kevin were dispatched to pick up the baby.
And, here she is. And she's ours. And she's never going to leave us!
And, here she is. And she's ours. And she's never going to leave us!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Hopefully 3rd Time is the Ticket
Yesterday we transferred 3 frosties; one was an 8 cell, the other was a 9 cell and the last was a 10 cell. They all look really good. The lab had to thaw 6 to get these three, so that leaves us with 2 in the bank. The Md. stated that she wasn't too worried about triplets but hoped we would be ok with twins. HELL YES!! I'd be ectactic with a baby that is healthy with all ten fingers and toes.
I spent all day yesterday on the couch and was a very good patient. I actually slept for most of the time but also watched 2 movies (Doubt and the Miracle at St. Anna) and played Wii before heading to bed to sleep some more.
I'm feeling pretty good, although I'm still tired and could nod off shortly. My loving husband brought me a box of BluBoy Chocolate last night. I think my plan of attack for the day is to eat lunch, eat a chocolate, retype an outline for a Seminar presentation on Guardianships, Sleep, read more James Bond ("From Russia with Love") and so on and so forth. I do go back to work tomorrow but have promised myself, and others, to take it slow.
So, I'm feeling positive, feeling good and will try to take each day as it comes.
I spent all day yesterday on the couch and was a very good patient. I actually slept for most of the time but also watched 2 movies (Doubt and the Miracle at St. Anna) and played Wii before heading to bed to sleep some more.
I'm feeling pretty good, although I'm still tired and could nod off shortly. My loving husband brought me a box of BluBoy Chocolate last night. I think my plan of attack for the day is to eat lunch, eat a chocolate, retype an outline for a Seminar presentation on Guardianships, Sleep, read more James Bond ("From Russia with Love") and so on and so forth. I do go back to work tomorrow but have promised myself, and others, to take it slow.
So, I'm feeling positive, feeling good and will try to take each day as it comes.
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
Nevermind
The 15-year old high school drop-out decided she'd be a better parent than Jessica and me combined. That was her prerogative, I suppose. I'm still pissed about it.
Next up, thawing some frosties, followed by going through an adoption agency if that option craps out like it has the previous two times.
Next up, thawing some frosties, followed by going through an adoption agency if that option craps out like it has the previous two times.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
Shhhhhhhhhh
We're adopting. Keep your fingers crossed for some big news in the middle of June. I imagine most of you reading this blog already know of this news, but for those who don't and have a RSS feed, now you do.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Chat with Dr. Colver
First, we decided to wait on investigating adoption until we talked with Dr. Colver about our options. We're not giving up on it, but we watched an informational DVD from the law firm who is pretty influential in Indiana and decided we just don't have the energy or time to dedicate to an adoption search right now. Besides, the DVD kind of turned us off of that firm. Lots of information, and we don't doubt their sincerity, but it just felt wrong for us.
Second, we chatted with Dr. Colver Thursday by phone. He said we can move forward with transferring the frozen embryos whenever we are ready. The way it works is they thaw out three and see if they revive. They keep thawing them out until they have three that are progressing and they implant all three in Jessica the next day. So, the first three could revive, leaving us with 5 remaining frosties, or it could take all 8 and none could revive. We'll just have to see. But, he was hopeful that doing this in the course of a natural cycle would produce results for us better than a transfer two days after Jessica's been pumped full of hormones for weeks. Also, the embryos that were frozen look fantastic, so that's another thing going for us.
However, Dr. Colver did throw a warning wet blanket on things. Because we changed tactics this past IVF cycle, we don't have anything to base our experience off of. First time we transferred on Day 5. Things looked so good on day three that we pushed it back. Between Day 3 and Day 5, the quality and viability of our embryos fell off rapidly, to the point that only two were kicking on Day 5, and them not looking hot.
Because we went on Day 3 this past IVF cycle, we didn't have an opportuninty to see if the same thing would happen a second time; that things looked good on Day 3 and fell off by Day 5. We'll probably find that out to some extent because of how the frozen transfer works (implantation on Day 4, essentially). We have to be prepared that if we notice a falling off of quality and viability, this just might not be meant to be. My sperm could just be such bad quality that this isn't going to happen, no matter if it's Day 3, 4, 5, or 15.
But, we don't know, and we have frozen embryos, and they look really good, and we don't have to pump Jessica full of estrogen, so there's no reason to not give it a try. Dr. Colver just warns us that the pessimistic perspective has a real good shot at being reality. We kind of knew that. We've kind of known that all along. I think, though, that this is the first time that he was so blunt with us.
Second, we chatted with Dr. Colver Thursday by phone. He said we can move forward with transferring the frozen embryos whenever we are ready. The way it works is they thaw out three and see if they revive. They keep thawing them out until they have three that are progressing and they implant all three in Jessica the next day. So, the first three could revive, leaving us with 5 remaining frosties, or it could take all 8 and none could revive. We'll just have to see. But, he was hopeful that doing this in the course of a natural cycle would produce results for us better than a transfer two days after Jessica's been pumped full of hormones for weeks. Also, the embryos that were frozen look fantastic, so that's another thing going for us.
However, Dr. Colver did throw a warning wet blanket on things. Because we changed tactics this past IVF cycle, we don't have anything to base our experience off of. First time we transferred on Day 5. Things looked so good on day three that we pushed it back. Between Day 3 and Day 5, the quality and viability of our embryos fell off rapidly, to the point that only two were kicking on Day 5, and them not looking hot.
Because we went on Day 3 this past IVF cycle, we didn't have an opportuninty to see if the same thing would happen a second time; that things looked good on Day 3 and fell off by Day 5. We'll probably find that out to some extent because of how the frozen transfer works (implantation on Day 4, essentially). We have to be prepared that if we notice a falling off of quality and viability, this just might not be meant to be. My sperm could just be such bad quality that this isn't going to happen, no matter if it's Day 3, 4, 5, or 15.
But, we don't know, and we have frozen embryos, and they look really good, and we don't have to pump Jessica full of estrogen, so there's no reason to not give it a try. Dr. Colver just warns us that the pessimistic perspective has a real good shot at being reality. We kind of knew that. We've kind of known that all along. I think, though, that this is the first time that he was so blunt with us.
Monday, February 2, 2009
Next Steps Already
Jessica has already scheduled a meeting with Kirsh & Kirsh in Indy to begin the adoption process. We also have a follow-up appointment with Dr. Colver to discuss when we can move forward with the frozen embryos and the strategic options (sorry, it's the MBA in me) we hold for those embryos. Thaw 4 with the stats that it's a 50% chance they revive and begin to divide again? What happens if they all revive? Do we use 3? Can they be thawed and refrozen? Lots of questions to discuss with him.
Sunday, February 1, 2009
The day after
Well, the news has settled in a bit. We were actually expecting to get negative results, as Jessica started spotting on Friday. But, we tried to hold out hope until we got the official results from the doctors.
So, we're back to the start again. We're going to talk to Jessica's doctor this week to see what learning points we can take from a second failure and how to proceed with the 8 frozen embryos. We are, however, also going to begin to actively pursue adoption by setting up an initial meeting with Kirsh and Kirsh in Indy. As Jessica and I talked about where things stand, we want to make sure that by this time next year we are well on our way, substantively, actually, toward being parents, if not parents already. As Jessica said, we're not getting any younger. I'll be firmly in my 30's by then and Jessica will be leaving her 20's sooner than anyone wants to think. As young as we are, gulp, we're starting to feel our biological clocks thumping loudly. As Beth pointed out to us when she was here to help us recover from surgery, having babies is young peoples' jobs, not old people. We have a window of opportunity and it is still very big, but it will get smaller very quickly.
I'm optimistic, though, with the frozen embryos. Jessica's body has been jammed full of unnatural hormones to induce ovulation. I think that if her body has a chance to reset and she receives embryos in the course of a normal cycle that our chances will improve. I have zero science to base that on, but that's how I feel.
Our friends and family who are reading this know that we won't give up. It didn't take us long to move to that decision. We have back-up with embryos and, eventually, frozen sperm if needed. And adoption will be an option sooner rather than later. This one just sucks because things seemed so right. No hiccups, no dangerous levels of estrogen, plenty of back-up. And negative results. That's pretty damning for rational people like us. If everything goes right, everything should go right. Screw the odds and chances. It should have worked. That's what's pissing us off right now. But, we have no choice but to keep moving forward. And this time we have ammo.
So, we're back to the start again. We're going to talk to Jessica's doctor this week to see what learning points we can take from a second failure and how to proceed with the 8 frozen embryos. We are, however, also going to begin to actively pursue adoption by setting up an initial meeting with Kirsh and Kirsh in Indy. As Jessica and I talked about where things stand, we want to make sure that by this time next year we are well on our way, substantively, actually, toward being parents, if not parents already. As Jessica said, we're not getting any younger. I'll be firmly in my 30's by then and Jessica will be leaving her 20's sooner than anyone wants to think. As young as we are, gulp, we're starting to feel our biological clocks thumping loudly. As Beth pointed out to us when she was here to help us recover from surgery, having babies is young peoples' jobs, not old people. We have a window of opportunity and it is still very big, but it will get smaller very quickly.
I'm optimistic, though, with the frozen embryos. Jessica's body has been jammed full of unnatural hormones to induce ovulation. I think that if her body has a chance to reset and she receives embryos in the course of a normal cycle that our chances will improve. I have zero science to base that on, but that's how I feel.
Our friends and family who are reading this know that we won't give up. It didn't take us long to move to that decision. We have back-up with embryos and, eventually, frozen sperm if needed. And adoption will be an option sooner rather than later. This one just sucks because things seemed so right. No hiccups, no dangerous levels of estrogen, plenty of back-up. And negative results. That's pretty damning for rational people like us. If everything goes right, everything should go right. Screw the odds and chances. It should have worked. That's what's pissing us off right now. But, we have no choice but to keep moving forward. And this time we have ammo.
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
They're in!
Well, frankly, things could not be going better. We had a couple of very healthy embryos implanted today. I'll try to figure out how the scanner on our printer works and I'll show you all what they look like. They're very clear bundles of cells with lots of definition. Jessica's acupuncturist said he sees lots of those photos and they rarely look as well defined as ours. So, that's going really well. We're currently watching Man vs. Wild and trying to take it easy.
Another bit of good news is they froze all 8 of the other embryos! So, we have lots of options between that and two vials of frozen sperm. Like I said, things could not be going better than they are right now.
Another bit of good news is they froze all 8 of the other embryos! So, we have lots of options between that and two vials of frozen sperm. Like I said, things could not be going better than they are right now.
Big day today
'Tis 8 AM and we're leaving in about 20 minutes to go up to Indy for implantation. Jessica has an acupuncture session before, the actual procedure at noon, followed by another acupuncture session. Beth is taking us and Janet is tagging along. I'll be there with Mergers & Acquisitions homework to occupy my time (yay?) while my wife is being poked by a variety of needles.
The hard part starts today -- keeping Jessica layed out on her back for a full week. Luckily, I'm moving around really well and should be able to take all the stairs necessary for the week. I'm even planning on going to classes this week. This part is also hard because it's the start of the long wait until we test to see if the implantation took.
So, I'm sure Jessica will post quite a bit over the next week because she has nothing but time, but there won't be any hard news for a while after today.
The hard part starts today -- keeping Jessica layed out on her back for a full week. Luckily, I'm moving around really well and should be able to take all the stairs necessary for the week. I'm even planning on going to classes this week. This part is also hard because it's the start of the long wait until we test to see if the implantation took.
So, I'm sure Jessica will post quite a bit over the next week because she has nothing but time, but there won't be any hard news for a while after today.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Updates coming frequently now
Got a call from from the biologist already this morning. Of the eleven eggs retrieved, 10 were fertilized and 9 are showing very healthy signs of cell division. They're going to keep an eye on the other one with the hopes it's just a bit behind the others.
Good news for me (Clint) is that they evidently found enough sperm to freeze "two vials". I don't know how many sperm that is, but it's very good news should we have to go through Round 3. They won't have to go digging in my balls! Yay!
So, we're not only doing well on our primary goal (fertilized eggs), we are looking good to attaining our secondary goal -- enough fertilized eggs to freeze -- and developed a very unexpected third benefit of allowing me to skip a round of surgery should things go way south over the next few days.
In short, things couldn't be going better to this point.
Good news for me (Clint) is that they evidently found enough sperm to freeze "two vials". I don't know how many sperm that is, but it's very good news should we have to go through Round 3. They won't have to go digging in my balls! Yay!
So, we're not only doing well on our primary goal (fertilized eggs), we are looking good to attaining our secondary goal -- enough fertilized eggs to freeze -- and developed a very unexpected third benefit of allowing me to skip a round of surgery should things go way south over the next few days.
In short, things couldn't be going better to this point.
Friday, January 16, 2009
Retrieval
The retrieval went well this morning. I was scheduled for 8:00 so I had to be there at 7:00. Clint's aspiration was at 9:00 so he was able to help me get dressed in my gown, booties and cap and get hooked up to the IV. He was sweet. When my nurse had a bit of trouble getting the IV in his eyes got a little moist. I asked him what was wrong and he said that he didn't like to see me get poked. I thought to myself, "a little late for that!" since I've been poked constantly in this process.
My mom and our family friend, Susan were with me when I woke up. Susan conceived both of her children through GIFT, which I guess was the predecessor to IVF so she knows exactly what I am going through. The doctor reported they retrieved 11 eggs which, while less than last time, is still a good number. After I dressed they wheeled me down to wait for Clint. Clint's doctor reported they only had to aspirate the left side and that they found "happy swimmers." I love the image that language provides me!
So, we begin the waiting period while my healthy eggs and Clint's happy swimmers get it on. I'm a bit sore, and I know Clint is very sore so we're just going to take it easy this weekend. My mom is here which is a help, and I'm sure she'd be happier if I moved around a lot less. She helped me prepare dinner, washed the dishes (and my stovetop, which was slightly embarrassing), and even brought in the trash cans since our sanitation guys aren't comeing for another week. My poor mother; she spends most of her winter in south florida and comes up here to help me during the coldest week of the winter season. Thank God for the maternal instinct.
We are incredibly appreciative of the many messages of support and love from our friends and family we have received lately. We are also grateful for all of our friends who are bringing food and entertainment to us, and are helping us with our household chores (particularly those associated with our four-legged crew). We are lucky people to have such a network of indiviuals who care for us. So, thank you, from the bottom of our hearts.
We will have a fertility report tomorrow afternoon and will report back then. In the meantime, please keep up your prayers!
My mom and our family friend, Susan were with me when I woke up. Susan conceived both of her children through GIFT, which I guess was the predecessor to IVF so she knows exactly what I am going through. The doctor reported they retrieved 11 eggs which, while less than last time, is still a good number. After I dressed they wheeled me down to wait for Clint. Clint's doctor reported they only had to aspirate the left side and that they found "happy swimmers." I love the image that language provides me!
So, we begin the waiting period while my healthy eggs and Clint's happy swimmers get it on. I'm a bit sore, and I know Clint is very sore so we're just going to take it easy this weekend. My mom is here which is a help, and I'm sure she'd be happier if I moved around a lot less. She helped me prepare dinner, washed the dishes (and my stovetop, which was slightly embarrassing), and even brought in the trash cans since our sanitation guys aren't comeing for another week. My poor mother; she spends most of her winter in south florida and comes up here to help me during the coldest week of the winter season. Thank God for the maternal instinct.
We are incredibly appreciative of the many messages of support and love from our friends and family we have received lately. We are also grateful for all of our friends who are bringing food and entertainment to us, and are helping us with our household chores (particularly those associated with our four-legged crew). We are lucky people to have such a network of indiviuals who care for us. So, thank you, from the bottom of our hearts.
We will have a fertility report tomorrow afternoon and will report back then. In the meantime, please keep up your prayers!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Tomorrow's the day
Late to post, I know, but we're heading up to Carmel at 5:30 tomorrow morning for the retrieval. Our neighbor is a nurse and administered the scary deep-tissue shot into Jessica's butt at 8 PM last night to stimulate ovulation. Beth has arrived from Florida to care for us for a week. Books and DVDs have been loaned by Jessika Hane for Jessica's pending week-long bed-rest. Duriya is staying with the next family who will host her for the week. Chelsea is coming by to take the dogs to daycare once we leave. So, this is a pretty good team effort.
Jessica goes under around 8 tomorrow morning, me at 9.
Jessica goes under around 8 tomorrow morning, me at 9.
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Delayed
Our appointment today confirmed that while things are going well, we are going to be delayed until at earliest, Thursday, but more likely, Friday. My estrogen levels are at 695, which is good so they are no increasing my dosage but my largest follicles are only at 13mm (18-20 is ideal). I have some growing to do but no one is worried. Right now, it feels as if I have golf ball sized ovaries. I'm not quite at the tennis ball sized stage where it hurts to tie my shoes--that will come around Tuesday or Wednesday.I'm just tired of hauling my butt up to Carmel all the time. I'm ready to have a finite time frame in front of me--a light at the end of the tunnel.
That being said, Friday is a good day. It gives me more time to get work done, Clint gets to go through the first week of his new classes and my mom will be here, so we won't have to go begging for rides. Not that I was not grateful for all the people who offered help to us, but I want my family with me. Its a very stressful procedure and humbling at the same time. I'm drugged, naked, hooked up to an IV with cold fluid running though my system, set in stirrups, poked and prodded in my netheregions while my husband is having a similar experience downstairs and afterward I need help even putting my underwear on. Generally, I don't like exposing people outside of my inner circle to all of the above. Plus, its nice to be able to share this experience, for good or for ill, with my Mom. She knows how much I want to have a baby and has walked in my shoes before. Call it the circle of life, but it is good to have her with me.
So, needless to say, we're looking at a Friday retrieval. I go back up to Indy on Tuesday and should have more specific details then. After my appointment I go have another acupuncture session. Hopefully during this upcoming week I will be able to do yoga after work for relaxation--that should help to. I just need this week to pass quickly, for both our surgeries to be successful, to have lots and lots of fertilized eggs, and for 1 (or more) to take. That's not asking so much is it??
That being said, Friday is a good day. It gives me more time to get work done, Clint gets to go through the first week of his new classes and my mom will be here, so we won't have to go begging for rides. Not that I was not grateful for all the people who offered help to us, but I want my family with me. Its a very stressful procedure and humbling at the same time. I'm drugged, naked, hooked up to an IV with cold fluid running though my system, set in stirrups, poked and prodded in my netheregions while my husband is having a similar experience downstairs and afterward I need help even putting my underwear on. Generally, I don't like exposing people outside of my inner circle to all of the above. Plus, its nice to be able to share this experience, for good or for ill, with my Mom. She knows how much I want to have a baby and has walked in my shoes before. Call it the circle of life, but it is good to have her with me.
So, needless to say, we're looking at a Friday retrieval. I go back up to Indy on Tuesday and should have more specific details then. After my appointment I go have another acupuncture session. Hopefully during this upcoming week I will be able to do yoga after work for relaxation--that should help to. I just need this week to pass quickly, for both our surgeries to be successful, to have lots and lots of fertilized eggs, and for 1 (or more) to take. That's not asking so much is it??
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Up up and away!
So I went from an estrogen level of 20 on just lupron to an estrogen level of 127 on Wednesday on just a few days of follostim. The funny thing is, that isn't quite high enough for my Md. He wants it a bit higher. This happened on the last cycle; I was just a bit lower then they wanted so they cranked up my follostim units. That made my estrogen to go off the charts so they're ratcheting me up slower this time, going from 150 units to 175 units. I'm interested to see where I'm at after tomorrow's appointment.Nonetheless, everything is looking good and on track. I have a very healthy, layered lining, and 5 follicles on each ovary. I will report back after tomorrow's appointment to see how things have grown.
After wednesday's appointment I had a consultation and treatment with the acupuncturist right across the hall from my Md. It was interesting. I had to fill out 5 pages of medical history. The acupuncturist was very professional. He thourougly explained things to me and let me ask as many questions as I wanted. I didn't have too many questions, I just wanted to see how it worked. I had a series of points on my back that he put needles in, concentrating around my lower back/hip region. Then I turned over and he hit some points in my lower abdomen to stimulate my ovulation. At the very end, he put three little dots, with either pressure points or magnets (they're so small) in a line from my belly button to near my public line. I had to leave those on until bedtime tonight. The main thing he emphasized to me was to reduce my stress...Hah. I will try but I make no promises. I did come home last night and do some yoga. Tonight was a different story. I didn't get home from work until 7 and went straight to making dinner. I did feel pretty relaxed all day and slept like a baby Wednesday night. My cold also cleared up, which I'm not sure is attributable to the acupuncture or just the passage of time.
I know... I'm adding insult to injury by doing acupuncture on top of all my other needles and injections but, if this is the way I de-stress and create a hospitable environment for my zygotes then so be it. I have another session on tuesday, then the day of the transfer both before and after the transfer. If this gets me pregnate, then I'll become the biggest advocate of eastern practices. If it doesn't then I can't say I didn't try everything.
After wednesday's appointment I had a consultation and treatment with the acupuncturist right across the hall from my Md. It was interesting. I had to fill out 5 pages of medical history. The acupuncturist was very professional. He thourougly explained things to me and let me ask as many questions as I wanted. I didn't have too many questions, I just wanted to see how it worked. I had a series of points on my back that he put needles in, concentrating around my lower back/hip region. Then I turned over and he hit some points in my lower abdomen to stimulate my ovulation. At the very end, he put three little dots, with either pressure points or magnets (they're so small) in a line from my belly button to near my public line. I had to leave those on until bedtime tonight. The main thing he emphasized to me was to reduce my stress...Hah. I will try but I make no promises. I did come home last night and do some yoga. Tonight was a different story. I didn't get home from work until 7 and went straight to making dinner. I did feel pretty relaxed all day and slept like a baby Wednesday night. My cold also cleared up, which I'm not sure is attributable to the acupuncture or just the passage of time.
I know... I'm adding insult to injury by doing acupuncture on top of all my other needles and injections but, if this is the way I de-stress and create a hospitable environment for my zygotes then so be it. I have another session on tuesday, then the day of the transfer both before and after the transfer. If this gets me pregnate, then I'll become the biggest advocate of eastern practices. If it doesn't then I can't say I didn't try everything.
Monday, January 5, 2009
Place your bets!
I had a bit of a scare today. I went to the restroom around 11am and found out I was spotting a bit. Considering that I'm supposed to be building up my endometrium lining in preparation of zygote implantation, any loss of blood is bad. I tried not to panic but I did end up calling the nurse and leaving a message for her. Then I went to lunch with my boss.
When I got back from lunch the nurse had left a message. She said that sometimes, patients experience spotting when they go from having really low estrogen levels to really high levels--they get overstimulated and their bodies freak out. She said this was likely the situation with me, considering that my estrogen levels on just Lupron last Tuesday were around 20 but now I've been on 3oo units of FSH for 3 days. I'm thinking to myself, what the heck is my level going to be on Wednesday when I go up for my next battery of tests? 100? 200? Does anyone want to place a bet? It could be fun! What does it need to be at? Ack!!!! Often I have such an out of body experience with this stuff thatI feel like my brain is floating 10 feet above my body, which has become a test subject for a lab, with people hovering over it, taking random samples from it and poking it in places.
No need to worry. Nothing more happened after that brief occurence and I went about my day as normal. I'm really tired right now but don't know if that is due to the sinus infection I've been battling for a while or all the meds I'm on. Sigh. I'm beginning to look forward to spending a week on the couch.
When I got back from lunch the nurse had left a message. She said that sometimes, patients experience spotting when they go from having really low estrogen levels to really high levels--they get overstimulated and their bodies freak out. She said this was likely the situation with me, considering that my estrogen levels on just Lupron last Tuesday were around 20 but now I've been on 3oo units of FSH for 3 days. I'm thinking to myself, what the heck is my level going to be on Wednesday when I go up for my next battery of tests? 100? 200? Does anyone want to place a bet? It could be fun! What does it need to be at? Ack!!!! Often I have such an out of body experience with this stuff thatI feel like my brain is floating 10 feet above my body, which has become a test subject for a lab, with people hovering over it, taking random samples from it and poking it in places.
No need to worry. Nothing more happened after that brief occurence and I went about my day as normal. I'm really tired right now but don't know if that is due to the sinus infection I've been battling for a while or all the meds I'm on. Sigh. I'm beginning to look forward to spending a week on the couch.
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